Once Upon A Wish
by Lizzie Hopscotch
Summary: Voldemort may have lost the war, but Hermione has lost everything. One simple wish changes everything, and Hermione gets a second chance. Abandoned.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.**

**I know, its been done, but I wanted to do my time travel fic and thats exactly what this is. So without further ado I give you - **

**Once Upon a Wish**

For the first time in six years, I board the Hogwarts Express alone. The war had been hard on us all, and the losses were great. The entire Weasley clan had been decimated in a fire set by Bellatrix LeStrange. Harry and I had found arrived at the blaze too late, all we could do was watch as the Weasleys burned alive even though every door and window was open.

She had warded them in.

No matter how hard we tried to free them, or put out the blaze nothing seemed to work.

The wards disappeared only when every Weasley was dead.

Harry's eyes went vacant and he stopped speaking completely. With a single strike Voldemort had succeeded in breaking the Chosen One. He had lost so much already, and now his second family was dead.

That was the first time I experienced true hatred for the dark. Before they had simply been abstract enemies, but now I knew there was nothing abstract about them. I would hunt them down and destroy them, with or without Harry.

After a month of grief induced catatonia, Harry snapped back with a vengeance. He threw himself into hunting Horcruxes with a frightening determination. When the Final Battle arrived he was worlds away from the quiet boy I met on the Hogwarts Express in first year. As we stood together on the Hogwarts Grounds where the final fight would be, he was burning with a need for it to over.

I didn't understand what that meant though, because the battle began in earnest. The Battle seemed to last forever, spell sparks ignited pale corpses for a split second. It was in one of those moments when I found the focus of my hatred.

_Bellatrix._

Spell after spell was cast, until I disarmed her and drank in the fear in her eyes. She and I both knew that Lord Voldemort would not save her. I killed her quickly, but not before she saw the body of her demented Lord sink slowly into the churning mud.

When it was over, the death count was over 500. Most of the Order had fallen in battle whilst many of the Death Eaters had committed suicide once they realised Voldemort was dead.

Harry simply stared at the carnage, the Light and Dark lying together in the mud. I caught a glimpse of his lifeless eyes before he disapparated.

In the month that followed there was no news of him. He had vanished from the Wizarding World. In that time Hogwarts was rebuilt and the wards recast. The Death Eaters were put on trial and most had their wands snapped and then placed in Azkaban. The Dementors had been banished and were now on the Deadly Creatures list. Unfortunately no one had figured out how to kill them, but most teachers were campaigning to have the Patronus Charm made compulsory to learn. Without the Dementors at Azkaban, the Ministry had devised a way to hold prisoners without the use of guards. They were instead sealed in lightless cells, isolated from all. Food appeared once a week.

Most of them were dead already.

I was working on finding a new life for myself after the war, and that meant being accepted back into Hogwarts. Thankfully Headmistress McGonagall didn't even hesitate and my acceptance letter arrived almost immediately. I read the specified books within a week and was making up my library in my new apartment. I could no longer live with my parents. I had found them within days of arriving in Australia, and they were happy. It was a happiness I'd never seen on their faces before, so I left them to live out their lives as the Wilkins, whilst I became even more determined to carve out my own life as Hermione Granger.

My studies were a welcome distraction from my loneliness.

The letter from Harry came as a shock. I thought he had decided to cut off all ties to the Wizarding world, and I had been doing my best to respect that.

_Dear Hermione,_ it had begun

_Please meet with me at the Leaky Cauldron. I need to see you._

_ Harry._

I had apparated their without a thought. Harry needed me.

I found him rather quickly.

I just had to follow the screams.

Harry Potter, the boy-who-lived-, had killed himself.

The maid had found him that morning, hanging from the ceiling, his belt around his throat. Wizards muttered how utterly Muggle it was, how degrading for the Wizarding world. Not a word was said about how much of a tragedy it was.

I walked from the Leaky Cauldron in a daze. My family was gone. I felt nothing. Remus tried to snap me out of it, but the numbness was rooted deep.

Looking back on it now I should have seen it coming. It wasn't the simply the war that Harry had wanted over, but life itself. I rehashed every decision I ever made since the death of the Weasley family, trying to find some way I could have changed things. What if I'd tried to contact him? What if we had saved the Weasleys?

So now I am boarding the train the Hogwarts alone for my 7th year. The younger years, those that remain, stare at me with something akin to fear. I sit in a compartment alone, my only companion an advanced spell book. My studies are my only solace.

The book joins me at the Gryffindor table. Ginny's old year mates give me a wide berth. Of my old year only Neville has returned. The others are either dead, or trying to rebuild. I can see the same situation in the other houses. Padma Patil and Hannah Abbott raise their hands in greeting, and Draco exchanges nods with me. He fought for the Light in the end, killing his own father to save a group of first years caught in the cross-fire. His mother has invited me to their house many times, but I always decline. My studies are more important now.

I clap as the sorting hat finishes its song, its message much more jovial now the Dark Lord is gone. Although it still preached of balance that maybe now will happen. The sorting itself was quick, and the food appeared soon after. I ate mechanically, taking no pleasure from the delicious meal. Food is now only necessary for survival. I drown out the chatter with the written word, eating in solitude. Headmistress McGonagall gives a short speech, and we are dismissed.

I am in the same dormitory as I have always been; only this time I am roomed with strangers. Girls who fall silent at the sight of me.

I suppose that I am a sight worth looking at. Whilst my figure is good, and my features pleasing, it is not these that causes the silence. It is more the many scars on my arms, and when I remove my top to change, the marks criss-crossing haphazardly across my back.

I am sick of it.

I lie in my bed at Hogwarts, thick red curtains blocking out all light and sound. My eyes close as I try to find sleep, quietly hoping for a rest free of nightmares. My last thought as I slip away was simple, filled with the guilt of the survivor, and the longing of a little girl forced to grow up far too fast.

I wish I could have changed things.


	2. Chapter 2

It's the sound of breaking wood that launches me from my bed in my home in the small village of Hamble Oak and scrambling for my wand. It feels warm in my hand and engrained memories of combat has me approaching the door quickly, intent on evening the odds against whoever is foolish enough to attack me here at Hogwarts.

I run down the small stairway down into the living room, ducking behind a wall as a shot of blue light impacts where I previously stood.

My hands tremble and my heart beats erratically, memories of screaming bodies flashing behind my eyes.

A body lies just beyond the sofa, a thin leg a slash of white against the dark carpet. A voice inside cries out, a small child stunned by the harsh reality of losing my mother.

A man is fighting valiantly, but soon a flash green sends him crashing to the floor, and the attackers turn their attentions to me.

I'm shaking in terror as the masked attackers move forward, a chill preceding them, infecting me with dread. I should do something, anything. Raise my arm, say a spell. _Stop them!_ What use is all this knowledge if I can do nothing?

_I've faced these demons before_, I tell myself, _why can't I now?_

I'm moving before I can think, feet practically flying up the stairs to the sound of raucous laughter. The cold wood of my bedroom door is firm against my back, hastily sealed with clumsy spellwork. I close my eyes, trying to chase away the dream of Hogwarts and screaming and the hanging boy.

Dream?

My eyes fly open and take in the room for the first time. A single bed in the middle of a room walled with bookshelves. A teddy bear lies on the floor and an open book in lying in a shaft of moonlight on the window seat.

This is not the 7th year girl's dorm in Gryffindor Tower where Hermione Granger fell asleep.

This is the bedroom where sixteen year old Hermione Lockwood woke up with the memories of two lives crammed inside her brain.

I clutch my head as the memories fight each other before they settle, two timelines side by side. Knowledge swamps my system, the fact that the people lying dead downstairs are my parents and that I'm being hunted. _BANG._ I brush away sudden tears and fumble with my wand, casting sensor spells that no 16 yr old innocent had any business knowing.

I frown in confusion. No wards? _BANG. _ What kind of idiots had no wards when there were still rogue death eaters around, even with the worst ones in Azkaban?

_Death Eaters? Is that who attacked us? But Dumbledore said we were safe! _

Well, obviously Dumbledore was wrong. And of course it was Death Eaters, who else would attack us? _BANG._

_I don't know..._

Such strange thoughts are whirling round, I can hardly control them, but I must. I have to get out of here, find Harry - no not Harry, he's gone now - find _someone_ and work out what the hell is going on. _BANG._

That banging, how long has it been going? My wards feel thin, like my magic isn't used to being put to such use, and it isn't. My magic is changed, now born of two people who have somehow become one entity.

How does that even work? Surely it would drive someone mad?

No, don't think like that.

Focus on the problem.

How do I get out?

I cast several spells out the window, watching them impact and spark against an invisible barrier.

One flashed red, the others clear.

I had two ways out then, but would I be able to use them?

Using this magic felt strange, already my wards were beginning to thin.

Creating a Portkey would take too much energy, but I would get there (wherever "where" would be) in relatively one piece. If I apparate there's the chance of splinching from being magically exhausted.

But what if I...

_That's insane!_

But if it works...

_What if it doesn't?_

Then I'm unlikely to live to regret it for long.

_I don't want to die._

Which is why this will work.

It has to.

With a deep breath I drop the wards.

The door explodes inwards, missing me by scant inches. Menacing robed figures fill the narrow space, dark cloth creeping forwards like tendrils of shadow.

I imagine them smiling behind their wicked masks. Their prey is caught in the trap, time for the kill.

I breathe.

They stride confidently in the room, polluting the fresh space.

I fix the destination.

Their wands rise as one, noting my lack of defence.

The beginnings of curses pass their lips.

I spin.

The curses fly towards me. Red, blue, purple, green, pink, orange - a veritable rainbow of pain.

I vanish.

The curses vanish with me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer - I no Own.**

**For Kathy: I'm holding you to that deal.**

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><p>Blinding pain greets me as I land face first in the gravel.<p>

How many spells hit me? All of them? Some of them? None of them?

Have I simply over-exerted myself? No, a fragile bubble of power still exists within me, I can feel it burning as curses make their way through me.

I look around cautiously. I'm outside where I expected to be inside the house. Had Harry warded it before his death?

Lights flick on inside. He'd sold it? Or was it sold after his death?

I draw on my remaining strength and send up a tiny pulse of bright light into the dark sky.

The pain is causing my vision to go blurry, but I think...maybe...are those people? Will they help me, or perhaps will they turn and hurry away?

I have no control over this.

Muffled shouts of alarm reach my ears, and the feeling of soft hands against my skin -.

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><p>"No, no, stay down dear."<p>

Soft hands push me back down into the warm bed. I can feel bandages wrapped around my chest. I try to move again, but the hands are firm. My eyes focus on the woman before me, she looks about late thirties with a kind smile. She reminds me of Mrs Weasley and her motherly instinct, but without the fiery red hair. Her hands stay at my shoulders; my mouth opens and closes, no sound emerging.

"There now dear, wait just a minute," she reaches to the table brings a cup of water to my lips. "Sip slowly…there we go."

"Who are you?" I whisper, my voice no more than a rasp.

"I'm Dorea Potter, and who are you?"

"Potter?" I repeat, "But they're all dead."

"Dead?" the lying woman laughed. "I can assure you we're all very much alive. Me, my husband Charlus and my son, James."

I stare at her incredulously.

"And who are you dear?"

"Hermione Lockwood." I answer without thinking.

_Who's Hermione Lockwood?_

I am…aren't I?

_So then who's Hermione Granger?_

That's me too.

_But you can't be both._

But…I am.

I am Hermione Lockwood, born 5th of April 1960, but I am also Hermione Granger, born 19th of September 1979.

I have all the memories of both girls, I am them…but also…not.

But how?

"Miss Lockwood? What is it?" Mrs Potter asks.

"Nothing. I'm sorry. What…what's the date?"

"It's the 5th of August."

"And the year?"

"Year? You've not been out that long don't worry. It's still 1977."

1977?

_1977?_

What. The. Fuck.

Mrs Potter smiles at me, seemingly oblivious to my turmoil.

"You rest now Miss Lockwood. It'll all look better in when you wake up."

Better? How can it be better? My parents are dead, I'm in 1977 and bandaged like a mummy!

But I smile at her weakly and close my eyes.

Why? Why am I back in time? Last thing Hermione Granger remembers is going to bed in Gryffindor Tower…

Oh.

Oh. Shit.

Fuck. Shit. Balls.

How could I be so _stupid?_

Who makes wishes in a magical castle?

_Apparently me. _

Fuck.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi! I'm back! Again =P**

**Um, just a quick note the thoughts in italic are the thoughts of Hermione Lockwood, whereas the ones in normal font are Hermione Granger. And with that that out of the way - Enjoy! =D**

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><p>When I wake up again breathing is easier and sitting up is now less painful. I sit there for a moment, wondering if it's possible to move my legs yet.<p>

One foot twitches.

The twitch turns into a shifting movement and I manage to swing my legs over the side of the bed. I glare at the floor underneath them, challenging it to come any closer as I go to stand.

"Whoa whoa whoa!"

Hands attached to a dark haired youth keep me in place. The sudden touch shocks me into action and I'm standing before my mind can register the action. His hands drop away and he smiles at me.

"Or you know, go ahead and stand." His smile is familiar, as is the similar mop of dark hair on his head. His eyes though are not the shade of green I am used to, but brown and still framed by wire glasses.

I remain silent.

"I'm James. You've been staying with my family since you arrived here. How are you feeling?"

He could be a Deatheater.

"It's the summer holidays at the moment. I've never seen you at Hogwarts before…did you go somewhere else?"

This could all be a trick.

"Mum called the Headmaster. He's the greatest wizard in the world. You can trust him."

All the great wizards are dead.

"Hey! You could be going with me to Hogwarts next year!"

This time travel nonsense is just that. Nonsense.

"I'm a Gryffindor, and so are my best mates Remus, Sirius and Peter. Sirius is staying with Remus at the moment. Mum thought it best not to crowd you with too many people."

I flinch inwardly at the names. Two dead friends and a traitor.

"Hermione? That's your name right? Mum said that's what you told her…how old are you? Mum guessed about 16…when's your birthday?"

19th of September.

_No. It's the 5th of April._

Goddammit this two identity thing is so stupid. Why do I feel so wretched about those people in the house? I didn't know them and yet they're my parents. But my parents were in Australia, happily living the lie I fed them about being successful dentists with the world at their feet.

A person cannot exist in two timelines.

"Hermione? Why won't you talk?"

_Because this cannot be real._

You are a Deatheater that escaped capture casting an elaborate illusion in order to gain information.

_My parents cannot be dead._

I will not let this happen.

_Where will I go?_

I won't give in to this fantasy.

_I don't have anyone but them._

Silence will be my friend.

_I can't be a bother to them. What if they throw me out?_

Stay quiet Hermione.

_Stay quiet Hermione. _

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><p>It's later in the day that Dumbledore visits me. By that time I have managed to take a few wobbly steps across the room, but Dorothea caught me and put me back to bed. She gave me some soup and some stern words about overtaxing my body. She reminded me a little of Madam Pomfrey in her manner.<p>

The man in the chair by my bed (not Dumbledore, Dumbledore is dead) is almost an exact copy. He still has that long grey beard and air of mystery that helped spread rumours of his omniscience. His eyes twinkle through half-moon glasses and his hand is extended with an offering of a muggle sweet.

He is younger though. Crinkles are only half formed and his smile is strangely more free then the enigmatic one I remember.

The broad facts are correct, but the small details are wrong. This is not real.

_He really does look wise. _

"I am Albus Dumbledore. And you are?"

He pauses, waiting for me to speak.

Stay silent.

_Dorothea already told him my name._

"I see. You don't trust us, do you Miss Lockwood?"

Knew it.

_Why is he trying to get me to speak?_

"Will you at least tell me about the attack?"

What attack? None of this is real.

_Talking won't bring them back. _

"If you tell me, then I can bring the people who did this to justice."

Because you did a bang up job of that the first time around.

_They wore masks. I know nothing._

"I can keep you safe, Hermione. You don't need to fear. You can come to Hogwarts, it's the safest place in the world."

Tell that to those who died there. Students who fought in your name.

_If it's so safe, why did my parents homeschool me?_

Dumbledore sighs and stands. He knows I won't talk, and I haven't been looking him in the eye either.

"Think about it Miss Lockwood. We only want to help you."

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><p>I keep to my vow of silence, no matter how much Dorothea and James try to get me to talk. I met Charlus the same day as Dumbledore. He was a quiet man, but his eyes showed worry. He didn't press me to talk, but gave me some books to read and then gave me more when he realised how quickly I was reading them.<p>

A week after my crash landing at the Potter's, Dorothea gave the green light for me to go outside. My wounds are mostly healed now, superficial cuts the only remaining damage. I have strength back in my legs and my magic is itching to be used. I haven't touched my wand. I don't know how this new mesh of Lockwood and Granger magic will react to spells I use.

What if my spells fail?

_My spells have never failed._

I dismiss the thought for now and work on pulling on the clothes bought for me by Dorothea. New blue jeans that need to be worn in, a dark green t-shirt that's a bit too big. Purposefully I think, if the way Dorothea tuts when I eat is any indication. I pull on some trainers and stand, moving across the room.

James is waiting at the door when I open it, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"Hey! Good to see you out of bed." He grins and my heart twists. "Want to see the gardens? Mum's gonna make us a picnic,"

I feel myself nodding, his enthusiasm infectious.

He takes my hand and leads me throw the house. It looks so different from when I saw it last. The walls were covered in smiling pictures and the wooden floors gleamed.

"There's a summer fete on down in the muggle town just a ways from here. We go every summer. Hopefully you'll come with us right?"

Us? Right, the Potters and probably the Marauders.

_Will there be lots of people?_

"Everyone's really friendly, and the food there is great. Hey, I'll try and win you a giant teddy bear. Or you could win me one." A friendly wink and a laugh.

He obviously hasn't figured out that the games are rigged.

_I miss my bear._

The sun is warm against my skin as we step outside. I stop and stare at the perfectly maintained gardens filled with blooming flowers, not a single dead head in sight. The air is filled with the sound of buzzing bees and I flinch slightly at the thought of them.

"Knew you'd like it out here," James says cheerfully, leading me over to a table set up with food. He pulls my chair out with a courtly bow that makes his hair flop over his eyes. I can't help laugh. It sounds scratchy from a week of silence and my throat hurts a little, but it's worth it for the look of shock that graces James's face. It morphs quickly into a gigantic grin though and he laughs a little with me.

"Knew you had a voice somewhere," he teases me and I am reminded of my resolution to stay quiet.

He can't gain anything from laughter though, can he?

_Is it okay for me to be happy so quickly? James is nice. He makes me smile. Is that okay?_

He sits down and starts placing food in front of me. He's teamed up with Dorothea to fatten me up I know it.

Only when he makes sure I'm eating does he start in on his food.

"So Dumbledore told us you're definitely coming to Hogwarts next year with us, but we don't know how old you are or how far you got in your schooling. What was your favourite subject? Mines flying and Defence Against the Dark Arts."

He's so like Harry it hurts.

_Transfiguration._

What? But I've always enjoyed Charms and Arithmancy.

You can't exist in two timelines, it's an established fact. One I knew quite well from my Third Year. Hermione Granger cannot exist in two times at once.

_But you're not Hermione Granger anymore. You're Hermione Lockwood as well. _

Of course I'm Hermione Granger! I have all her memories, her personality, her skill. How could I be anyone else?

_You also have the memories, personality and skill of Hermione Lockwood. _

And Hermione Lockwood had already existed in this timeline.

_Thus making it possible for Hermione Granger to continue to exist in this timeline._

If it is true that I am truly Hermione Lockwood as well as Hermione Lockwood then that could mean that the Butterfly Effect might not apply since the memories of Hermione Granger are from an alternate timeline. Hermione Lockwood knows what has already happened in the future, but what if we change it?

What if this is real? And I am now Hermione Lockwood, not Granger. What if I could change the future?

James is looking at me strangely, but I can't bring myself to care. Thoughts are raging a mile a minute and everything is slowly slipping into place.

The memories of Hermione Granger slip to the background, and Hermione Lockwood takes the fore, armed with the knowledge of what is to come and the skill of a seasoned fighter.

Tears dribble down my cheeks as pain wells up in my chest.

It hurts so much.

Before I realise it I'm sobbing, and James is holding me to him, whispering nonsense into my hair. I cling to him as I finally cry for my parents, for my lost home, and for all the pain Hermione Granger has had to endure.

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><p><strong>I don't do physics. Or time. Or any smart science stuff. The closest I get is Doctor Who...so if my little thing about timelines is totally wrong I'm really really sorry.<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**I suck. I'm so so sorry about the delay. RL kicked me in the teeth with the strength of ten really pissed off mules. **

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><p>"Come on Hermione, we're going to be late!" James calls through the door.<p>

I ignore him, breathing deeply. It has been a week since our picnic in the garden, and my thoughts are becoming more ordered, with preferences, memories and skills slowly aligning. Sometimes I still have problems with what thoughts are mine, and which thoughts belong to the independent Hermiones, but slowly I am blending, and becoming the two together.

Today though, this isn't my problem.

No, today my problem is James and this carnival.

Where there shall be people.

Specifically two people.

Sirius and Remus.

Not a cause for panic. Not at all.

It's not like I have memories of them dying or anything. Or that the idea of meeting new people (any new people apparently) fills me with dread.

"Are you okay?" James asks. "We don't have to do this today."

"No," I find myself saying, "it's okay. I want to do this."

I open the door and smile at him.

"Let's go."

He frowns.

"You sure?"

"Yes." I confirm, before taking his arm and dragging him towards the front door. "Besides, you promised me a teddy bear."

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We walked towards the bustling carnival after promising Charlus to meet him back at the Appiration Spot in the evening, and once more I feel the slight tingling of nerves. James takes my hand though and smiles at me reassuring me that he is here, that I'm still safe.

The carnival is large, with rides standing above brightly coloured tents. The smell of fried foods and sweets reaches us, even a field away, and the noise of exhilarated screams fills the air.

James keeps up a steady stream of chatter as we approach, telling me stories about last year's escapades, about how Peter was caught stealing some food but Remus pulled him out of trouble. He told me about how Sirius tried his hand at flirting with some of snack girls in the show tent, but soon came face to face with some very scary looking boyfriends.

He notices my silence though, and is quick to assure me that such antics won't occur again. I smile and raise an eyebrow and James looks sheepish.

"Mostly. They mostly won't happen."

I laugh and look towards the entrance. We were nearly there and I could see two figures standing together. James sees them also and starts yelling, waving his arms enthusiastically, pulling my arm up with him. The two boys notice us and wave back, walking to meet us halfway.

They greet each other with half hugs and back slaps, and I stand a little away, unsure of how I should react. Part of me is elated with their appearance, so happy and vibrant and _alive._

The other is filled with insecurities. What if they don't like me? Will James still stand by me? What if I say something stupid?

James pulls me out of these thoughts by yanking me to his side, his arm a comforting weight.

"Guys, Hermione. Hermione, Sirius and Remus."

"Hi," I say with a small smile and wave. The two are staring at me and James strangely, Remus frowning slightly. His sandy hair framed his face well, but the pale silver scars are still present. His gold eyes hold a hint of disapproval.

Sirius however just looks a bit confused, his hair is as shaggy as I remember, and I wonder if they have perfected their animagus forms yet. From the way he had cocked his head, they have to be either close or animagi.

"So this is the mystery girl." Sirius says eventually, "It's nice to finally meet you." Remus nods, still staring at James's arm.

I meet his gaze worriedly, near certain that this is not going to go well.

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James hands me a set of tickets with a grin, pocketing his own.

"Well guys, where to first?" We all look around, and Sirius grins.

"Ladies choice?"

James voices his agreement and Remus turns to face me.

"Um…the waltzer?"

"To the waltzer!" James cries triumphantly, marching off ridiculously. Sirius grins and follows him, grabbing my hand to pull me with him. I take Remus' hand in response and he at last smiles at me.

After the waltzer, which Sirius insisted on going on twice, we made our way to the Viking ship. The queue is a little bit longer than the one at the waltzer, so it's here that Remus says what's been bothering him.

"So how long did it take before you got together?"

I stop and stare at him, the phrase refusing to compute in my brain.

James is a little bit more articulate in his response.

"Huh?"

I shake my head at the clown and face Remus.

"We're not together." I say firmly.

"Uh-huh."

This time its Sirius who responds.

"We're not!" I defend. "James, tell them!"

"We're not." He confirmed. "You know I would never leave Lily."

I school my features to not react at the mention of Harry's mother. Would I be able to face her, knowing what I know? Will I see those emerald eyes look at me with hate or with friendship?

"Ah, yes, the fair Lily. Owner of James's heart." Sirius tells me dramatically.

"So what's with all the touching then?" Remus persists.

I freeze, not really willing to explain this one. James looks at me though, and I can see that he too is uncertain. It's a face I recognise as belonging to Harry, the little crease between his eyes whenever a textbook made no sense, or when he couldn't figure out one of Dumbledore's riddles.

I sigh.

"Since the," I pause, unsure how much they know, "the _attack_, I find its…_easier_ I guess, if someone touches me. Reminds me of what's real and what's a nightmare."

Sirius is glaring at Remus, who has the decency to look ashamed.

"I know you're just looking out for your friend." I say. "You don't know me, and it worries you a little to see your friend accept someone new so easily. That's okay." I smile. "But I promise I have no designs upon his virtue."

I look at James.

"He's like a brother."

James smiles down at me, hugging me to his side.

"Aaaaaand now that's out the way." My smile turns slightly evil. "Tell me all about _Lily._"

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The guys continued teasing James well into the afternoon, gleefully giving me all the ammo I will ever need against my newly christened big brother.

We wander the game stands, staring at all the different contraptions. Sirius and Remus are distracted by the rubber ducks, and attempt to catch them with varying degrees of success. I laugh as I watch them, but eventually they figure out how to hook them out of the water. Sirius crows with success at the red dot on the bottom of the duck, signifying he won the top prize, while Remus had won a modest middle sized prize. The two come back carrying their respective toys, a large cat and an orange squid.

A tap on the shoulder causes me to jump in alarm, spinning around ready for a fight.

I relax when I realise its James, who looks chagrined at his mistake. His hands are behind his back though, and a large grin is threatening to form on his twitching lips.

"I believe I made you a promise, dear sister." He drops the endearment naturally, as if he had always done so.

"Oh? And what promise would that be?" I smile.

He brings his hands round, and he's holding an adorable teddy bear with a red bow, shiny eyes smiling up at me.

"One teddy bear," he grins and hands it to me.

I hug it tightly, my eyes tearing up at the gesture.

I had missed my teddy bear so much, it was still in my old room in the Lockwood house. Probably now destroyed by the Death Eaters.

"Thankyou." I mumble into the bear's head, feeling James' arms wrap around me.

"You're welcome," he says, and lets me cry in the safety of his hold.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxmwah

Charlus meet us at the spot at six. Sirius and Remus are waiting for Remus' Aunt and the two will go back with her, although the four of us have arranged to meet to go to Diagon Alley together.

The elder Potter chuckles at the sight of us, James carrying a large black cat and me with the bear and squid.

Sirius and Remus, not to be outdone by James' offering of the bear, and also given me their winnings.

I'm touched they care so much after only an afternoon of knowing me.

I hug the boys goodbye, and they wink out of sight with the rush of side along appiration.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**I'm sorry about the delay. Hit a bit of a roadblock with it. Still not entirely happy, but I hope you like it anyway!**

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><p>The owl arrives at breakfast.<p>

It lands awkwardly on the table, looking between both me and James.

James reaches for the letters, while I feed the owl bits of bacon.

The letters removed, the owl ruffles it's feathers and flies out the open window.

"What have we got then?" asks Charlus as he sits next to Dorothea.

"Looks like Hogwarts letters," answers James, "even got one for Hermione."

He hands it to me.

I hold it warily, Dumbledore and I not being on the best of terms.

"Looks like he's trying to win you over," James smirks.

"Ha. Ha." I reply.

We open the letters together, although the contents are most likely to be the same.

_Dear Miss Lockwood,_

_You have been accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry as a part of the Seventh Year class commencing the 1__st__ September. As a timetable has not yet been confirmed for you, attached you will find the complete booklist of the Seventh Year syllabus. _

_The available subjects are:_

_Arithmancy_

_Ancient Runes_

_Divination_

_Herbology_

_Astronomy_

_Defence Against the Dark Arts_

_Potions._

_The subjects Transfiguration and Charms are compulsory. _

_Please reply with your chosen subjects before August the 31__st__._

_Many regards,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

_Head of Gryffindor,_

_Deputy Headmistress._

The booklist is extensive, some titles different, but most are the same as Hermione Granger's year.

This is both saddening and also a relief, I already have the knowledge to pass through the year, but I wish I could learn something new as well. Maybe I will have more time to study on my own this year, with the lack of yearly life or death situations.

Dorothea watches us with a smile on her face, and I can almost see the cogs in her brain plotting out the shopping trip. Charlus has returned to the Daily Prophet, which for once reported actual news rather than Ministry approved drivel.

"So what are you gonna pick?" James asks.

"I don't know."

"Well, you like Charms right?"

"Yeah, and arithmancy and potions and DADA and transfiguration and everything else!"

I rest my head on my arms.

"So no problem right?" he teases.

I smack his arm.

* * *

><p>Two days later we travel to Diagon Alley. We floo to The Leaky Cauldron one at a time, Charlus going first.<p>

The trip is quick, if a bit rough.

I step out the fireplace with James close behind me.

Dorothea appears last, and herds us out the pub.

"Robes first, I think." She begins. "And then we'll visit the apothecary. After that we'll go Flourish and Blotts for textbooks."

"Saving the best for last, huh, Hermione?"

"Yep."

Madame Malkins is the same as Hermione Granger's memories. The witch hovers around us, commenting on James' height and how nice it is to meet me.

The Apothecary was similar. Everyone is friendly to the Potters, and by extension, me. Dorothea shrinks our purchases and stores them in her bag in each shop.

"Now, Charlus and I are going to Rosa Lee's Teabags, so why don't you two have some fun, and we'll meet up at Flourish and Blotts in an hour or so. Okay?"

James grins and I nod. The four of us separate into pairs and James and I head towards Scribbulus Writing Instruments. A large group is heading towards us, spread across the road. As we get nearer the group show no sign of separating. We head to the side to try and get round but they are too wrapped up in their chatter to take notice. The group collides with us and separate James and me.

The group of men push and shove at me, until I reach a store front and stay there. When they have passed I can't see James, so I can only assume he had the same idea. I step back on the street, looking around for him.

"Now what do we have here?" a snide voice says over my shoulder.

I whirl round, my flight or fight instinct kicking in.

I can feel Hermione Granger rising to the surface, her experience in battle cataloguing the stranger's height, weight and any easy vulnerable spots. I try to calm down, sure that this person means me no harm.

"I'm Hermione. And you?"

"Jugson. Why were you stuck in the corner?"

"I lost my friend."

"That's a shame. Hermione what? Maybe I can help you find them."

"Lockwood. And it's okay, I'm sure he'll find me in a minute."

"Lockwood? Weren't they all killed?" his face gets a funny look.

I take a step back.

"I think I'm going to find my friend now."

"Friend? Or boyfriend?"

"My brother."

He grabs my arm.

"Brother? Now I don't think that's possible. See, I know the Lockwoods."

I frown, I don't remember this man.

"I think you're running. I think you're that little bitch that escaped us. A filthy little half-blood whore."

This man killed my parents?

_He killed my parents_.

I reach for my wand, he can't notice. Have to keep him talking.

"Half blood? You mean like your pissant of a lord?"

He slaps me.

"How dare you speak such lies!"

His wand arm comes up, a curse on his lips.

My wand is pointed to him, the words already half spoken.

"_Pung-"_

"HERMIONE!"

Jugon releases my arm and hides his wand.

I keep mine in my hand.

I turn slightly, watching James run towards us.

"There you are! I'm glad I found you. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

He mustn't know anything is wrong. He can't know who Jugon is. He could hurt James.

"Hey, man, thanks for helping my sister."

"That's fine, glad to be of help. I'm Jugon, you?"

"James Potter. You ready to go Hermione?"

"Yeah." I meet Jugon's eyes. "I won't forget your help."

We walk away from the Death Eater, but I can't stop myself from looking back. He walks into a small crowd.

My wand raises up, and a cutting hex hits his left arm.

The cloth shreds.

A tattoo is revealed.

Someone screams and spells start flying.

James looks to the chaos and drags me into the nearest shop.

"Hermione stay here with me. Don't move okay?"

We stay there, watching as the Aurors arrive and take Jugon into custody.

Part of me feels bad about what I just did. People were undoubtedly hurt in the encounter. The larger part however feels proud. I helped put a murderer away.

Maybe Mum and Dad will be proud too.

James is looking at me oddly. He knows I'm not telling him something.

"Did you do that?" he asks quietly.

I nod.

"_Why_?"

I keep my voice low.

"He helped kill my parents."

James gives me a hard look, but he doesn't say anything.

The chaos outside the shop dies down and we decide to head to Flourish and Blotts now instead of later.

The bookshop is wonderful.

Books from floor to ceiling of all kinds of subjects. The smell of parchment and leather is like coming home again and I bounce lightly on my feet.

"Wow. I guess you really like books."

"Just a little bit." I reply. "Maybe."

"Have you decided which subjects to take?" His words are slightly stilted.

"Do you hate me now?"

"What?" He seems shocked by my question. "Why would I hate you? You're my sister."

The fact he still feels that way makes me smile, but doesn't stop me from pushing.

"Because I put those people in danger."

James sighs.

"I think the way you went about it was wrong, but I heard the Aurors talking as they went past. No one was seriously hurt."

"But they _were_ hurt."

"Are you sorry about that?"

I shrug.

"A little."

"But you care about stopping Jugon more."

"Yes."

"I don't understand you sometimes Hermione. You're all sugar and smiles one minute and then a soldier the next."

"I have the memories of a war survivor." I tell him honestly, not that I think he'll believe me. "Sometimes they cross over into my personality."

"Right. Don't tell me." James shakes his head.

I look at him sadly.

Just because I expected this, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

"So. Subjects. Tell me." He changes the subject.

"Yes. Um, all but Divination and Herbology."

"_All of them?_"

"The more you know, right?"

"Will that even fit on a timetable?"

"Hopefully. If not I can always do Independent Study. I think it mentions something about that in the Hogwarts information Dumbledore sent last week."

"Um, yeah, I mean, Remus does that sometimes since his Aunt is ill a lot. So he misses classes to help take care of her."

Yes, being a werewolf would make attending all classes difficult.

"Hermione! James!" Dorothea spots us and hurries over. "Oh, Merlin, are you two alright? We heard about all the commotion and we got so worried when we didn't see you outside. You're not hurt are you? Hermione? Feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, Dorothea, really."

"Yeah, me too, Ma."

"Good. That's good." Dorothea takes a minute to breathe, her hands slowing their contant motion. "Have you got your books together?"

We hold up our respective baskets.

"Good." She repeats. "Then let's get out of here."

Couldn't agree more.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay so the spell Hermione was going to use on Jungon (who is a real character so no owny there too) was the stinging hex which has no known incantation. In the time honored tradition of using Latin for spells I translated the word "sting" (so original I know) making the spell she would have case "pungere". So if you see that again anywhere in this story - that's whats going on. <strong>

**Let me know whatcha think**

**Much Hugs**

**Lizzie Hopscotch**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Still don't own.**

**So, in order for me to encourage myself to keep writing, I've decided to try and update this fic every Sunday. If I don't feel free to PM me with a reminder/kick up the backside =)**

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><p>August 31st arrives too quickly. I'm not ready to see Hogwarts again or Dumbledore.<p>

Dorothea is crying already as we floo to the station.

"You've not been with us for long and now you're leaving!" She holds me in her arms.

"I'll be fine, Dorothea. James'll help me and I already know some people."

"Oh I know, dear, but I'm a mother. Worrying is what I do."

James walks by with his trunk.

"Oh James!" she wails and drags him into the hug. "You promise to take care of Hermione?"

"Of course, Ma."

"Let them go, Dorothea. They'll be fine," Charlus reassures her.

"I'll fuss if I want too." She snaps back.

Eventually she releases both of us and steps back. "Stay safe this year, okay? And James, no pranks, please. You're Head Boy now and-"

"Wait, you're Head Boy? And you didn't _tell me_?"

"I-It didn't seem all that important." James defends.

"Of course its important!" I huff. "Next time you have big news you tell your sister first dammit."

"Well you got told Prongs,"

"Sirius!" Dorothea bustles past us and envelops him in her arms.

"Hey, Ma Dorothea. Good to see you." He said warmly.

We are quickly joined by Remus whom Dorothea also hugs. As soon as Sirius is released he grabs James and I in a hug. Remus joins in too and I feel absolutely safe surrounded by them.

The train whistle blows.

"Ma, we gotta go."

"Yes, yes, why are you still standing here. Go, go!" she waves us away and we scramble onto the train.

We manage to find an empty compartment and settle in.

"Dorothea!" I yell out the window.

She turns at the sound and pushes through the other parents to reach us.

"All settled in then?"

"Yep, all set Ma,"

"Oh, I'll miss you all." She dabs at her eyes. "I'll see you at Christmas and we'll all have a wonderful time, yes?"

"Definitely."

"See you soon, Dorothea." I smile at the woman who had quickly become a second mother to me.

The whistle blows and again and Dorothea turns to stand with Charlus.

We wave as the train pulls out of the station. I deny any existence of tears. Sirius slings an arm round me and Remus holds my hand lightly.

"So, Hermione. Looking forward to seeing Hogwarts?" Remus asks.

"Yes. I've read all about it in _Hogwarts: A History_."

"Oh god, not that bloody book again," Sirius groans. "Remus must've read it at least ten times already."

"It's a good book," I defend him. Remus nods along with me.

"The book doesn't do it justice," James interrupts. "When you'll see it you'll understand."

An image flits past behind my eyes. A castle illuminated by lamp light against a starry sky emerging from behind a cliff face. The silence of the lake as it draws closer and closer until it fills my vision.

"I guess I will."

* * *

><p>"James! What are you doing! We have to meet with the prefects!" a girl bursts into the compartment, yelling over my cries to Remus for help.<p>

The girl freezes at the sight of us.

Sirius had me pinned down and James was tickling me. Remus, the traitor, ignored me. Peter still hadn't found us and the neither the boys nor I were particularly interested in finding him.

"Lily-flower!" James leaps to the door, pushing me onto the floor.

"The meeting, James." The girl's tone was cold. "Now."

"Of course, my flower." James turns and bows, "Gentlemen, my Lady."

He flounces after her.

"Who was that?" I ask from the floor.

"Lily Evans," Remus helps me up.

"James' love of his life," Sirius continues, "sadly she won't give him the time of day."

"And now she thinks I'm his girlfriend," I finish. The boys do a double take.

"How'd you figure that?"

"It was obvious. She went all frosty when she saw us," I explain.

"So then…"

"That means…"

"She _likes_ him?" they finish together.

"Yep."

"Huh."

"Who knew?"

"Me." I smile smugly.

Harry would exist in this time line, Hermione Granger is determined to see it through. He will be born to two loving parents and I'm going to make damn sure they live to see him grow up.

* * *

><p>James didn't return to the compartment. The boys leave to let me change and I take the moment to steady myself.<p>

I'm going back to Hogwarts.

_I'm going to Hogwarts for the first time. _

I'm not worried about the sorting.

_But at the same time I'm terrified._

What if I'm put in a different house?

_I don't want to be separated from my new friends._

What if I mess things up?

_What if no one likes me?_

I breathe.

In. _Out_.

In. _Out._

In. _Out._

I can do this.

_I can do this._

* * *

><p>"Firs' Y'rs! This way to the boats!" A familiar voice shouts out to the student at the station. We step off the train. James is in front of me, Sirius and Remus behind. As soon as we step off I take James' hand and Remus takes the other one. Sirius is a comforting warmth at my back.<p>

"Miss Lockwood!" Hagrid calls. "This way t' the boats!"

"Hagrid!" James hurries over to the half giant. "How've you been?"

"A'right James? Yer sister ready to go to t'boats?"

"Hermione! Come meet Hagrid!" James waves us over.

"'Ello, 'Ermione. Nice to meet ya."

"Hi." I say quietly, remembering afternoons drinking tea in his hut and feeding rockcakes to Fang.

"Don't you worry. I'll see ya back to yer brother safe'n sound."

I smile and release Remus' hand.

I trust this man.

Always have and always will.

"Don't fall in Hermione," Sirius teases.

"Ha. Ha."

James pulls me into a hug.

"See you soon, sis."

I nod and leave with Hagrid.

James was right, as I knew he would be. The book was no substitute for the real thing. I can barely breathe as I watch the castle grow closer. I don't know how to feel as the boat nears the shore.

Hogwarts is my home.

Hogwarts is a battlefield.

Hogwarts is a new beginning.

But for me?

Or for everyone?

McGonagall meets us in the Entrance Hall.

"Gather round, first years, gather round."

Everyone gathers at the steps and Professor McGonagall begins her speech.

"Welcome to Hogwarts. Now, in a few moments you will pass through these doors, and join your classmates. While you are at Hogwarts, your house, will be like your family. Good behaviour will earn house points, any rule breaking will lose housepoints." She gives us all a cursory look. "I'll give you a minute to straighten up."

She leaves us to it.

The eleven year olds surrounding me share apprehensive looks and scared whispers. Some of them can't stop glancing over at me. A few snatches of conversation reach me.

"_Who is that?"_

"_She's too old!"_

"_Maybe she's dumb?"_

I breathe.

McGonagall returns.

"Step this way please."

The door opens, the First Years stream through.

"Wait a minute, Miss Lockwood."

"Yes, Professor?"

"Your name will be called last, so wait at the back. This is not to point you out in any way, it's just," she hesitates. "This is a unique situation, we very rarely have students starting so late."

"I understand, professor."

"Good." She turns and walks into the Great Hall with me following close behind.

The Sorting Hat is sitting upon the old stool, and the Hall is quiet.

Whispers stir at my presence.

My eyes sought out James, Remus and Sirius almost immediately. They wave at me. Lily huffs.

Names are being called.

The crowd of children (because really, that's what they are) slowly shrinks.

Finally it is just me, standing alone in the middle of the hall.

McGonanagall calls my name.

"Lockwood, Hermione."

My legs don't shake as I walk up to the stool.

They _don't_.

"Ahhhh. Hermione Lockwood, or is that Granger?" the hat's voice whispered in my ear.

_Both._

"As it should be."

_Put me in Gryffindor._

"Shouldn't that be my choice?"

_No._

_Is it?_

"So not completely melded then?"

_No._

"Well, plenty of brains and plenty of courage. So much loyalty and heart."

_So put me in Gryffindor and enough with the pageantry._

"If you say so, Miss Lockwood-Granger….GRYFFINDOR!"

I breathe a sigh of relief.

My brother and his friends are cheering. Then they are hugging me and introducing me to the others.

I smile.

They smile.

I'm back at Hogwarts, a Seventh Year Gryffindor surrounded by friends and family.

I'm safe.

I'm happy.

_I will make it better._

* * *

><p><strong>So...whatcha think?<strong>

**Much Hugs**

**Lizzie Hopscotch**


	8. Chapter 8

**Long story short I suck. Sorry for the delay.**

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><p>Developing friendships is difficult.<p>

Especially with girls.

And _especially_ when one of the most popular girls in school has decided you are persona non grata.

There are reasons why most of my previous friendships were with boys.

Classes made up for the general bitchyness of the girls though. Although the content was generally the same, the different teachers provided different insights into spell working.

Potions is the exception.

Slughorn is the same as he had always been.

"Hermione!" Sirius waves me over to the common room sofas.

"Hey guys."

"How was the first week of classes?" James askes, pulling me down next to him. Peter isn't there. When asked he always says he's been in the library, but I've never seen him in there.

"It went well. I should get started on these readings though,"

"Don't you read enough?" Sirius teases.

"I know you don't," I shoot back.

Remus chuckles. "She got you there, Padfoot."

Sirius kicks him lightly, "Shut up Moony,"

The girls from the dorms watch us. Lily is frowning. She still won't talk to me.

Remus and Sirius continue their teasing.

Their bickering gets louder and more dramatic, drawing attention from the entire room.

"Hermione!" Sirius shouts suddenly, "Defend my honour from this cad!"

"Why?" I smile, "He seems to have the right of it."

Remus tips an imaginary hat in my direction.

_It's so good to see him have fun._

"Oh I see, two against one is it?" Sirius smirks, "Sorry Prongsy, just need to borrow your girl here."

James gestures with his arm lazily, "Go for it mate."

"What? Hey!" Sirius grabs me and chucks me in between him and Remus. The two surround me with their arms.

"There. Much better. Away from those books too."

"Nope." I reach over, "I'll just have to nick Remus'."

Remus is too quick though and holds it just out of reach.

I sulk.

The boys laugh.

I watch Lily storm off out of the corner of my eye.

"Let me up," I demand.

"Oh no, not getting out of this one," Sirius tries to keep me with them.

I smack his arm.

"Up. Now."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good boy."

I follow Lily.

"What was that about?" Sirius asks.

I imagine James shrugging.

I jog to catch up with the fiery red head.

"Hey Evans, wait up!" I call, but she only speeds up. "Lily!"

She turns, anger flashing in Harry's eyes.

_He may have inherited them from her, but they are _his.

"What do you want?"

I don't answer. Even I'm not sure what it is I want.

"I…I want to know what I did."

Lily scoffed.

"What you did? You-you," she struggles to form the words. It occurs to me that perhaps even she doesn't know what I've done.

I decide to help her out.

"Is it James?"

"What? No!" She blushes an angry red. She tries to cover herself. "I just don't appreciate such inappropriate behaviour. It sets a bad example."

"Inappropriate? _How?"_

"The constant touching and flirting with the boys."

"I don't flirt." I deny. The touching I don't comment on.

"Well, you do. And its disgusting."

I try a different tact.

"James is my brother."

"I don't care what – wait, sorry? He's your _brother_?"

"Adopted, but yeah, James is my brother."

"Really? Oh thank goodness. I-I-I mean, and I care about this why?"

"Well, its one less guy for be to be 'inappropriate' with," I say, still slightly hurt.

She has the grace to look ashamed.

"I shouldn't have said that. It was untrue."

"Do I really flirt?"

She jiggles her hand, "A little."

"I don't mean to!" I wail.

"If it makes you feel better they're both flirting with you as well."

_Really?_

I step closer to her. "Like James flirts with you?"

Her blush deepens.

"Lily…Do you like my brother?"

She doesn't answer.

I smile.

We walk back together.


End file.
